Catching Up is Hard to Do

The Future is something which everyone reaches at the rate of sixty minutes an hour, whatever he does, whoever he is.C.S. Lewis

Trying to catch up on the past eight months is not do-able for the time being, however here are 10 points, in no particular order, to bring me back up to speed.

1) Home
I now live with the lovely man in the post prior to this one. He is as ever, incredible. Some cracks are beginning to show (i.e. he can't cook, clean and enjoys partying a bit much for me) but all in all, he is great and everything is going well.

2) Career
Late last year I was offered a job by a fantastic digital distribution company. Now three months in, I'm happy and getting used to a whole new side of the music industry. It wasn't the easiest move and I miss my old colleagues more than I expected to but my new colleagues are [mostly] great and this is a great experience. the main benefit of this situation is, I don't have to work 70 hours a week anymore!!!

3) Babies
My gorgeous little sister is pregnant. Oh dear. She is 17 and has her whole life infront of her. I can't say i'm over-the-moon about the situation but credit where it is due, she is one of the most clued up people I know and is showing a maturity beyong her years. I don't doubt for a second that she will be a fantastic Mum.

4) Travels
I was lucky enough to get to go to Cannes at the end of January for work. We went for a trade show and while it was busy and there were far too many meetings to be had, it's hard to complain when you are on the French riviera outside a bar soaking up the sun while talking numbers! It was an incredible place. Almost unreal. Everyone looked as though they had stepped off a catwalk, beer was 16euros and it wasn't uncommon to spend 40euro on a gin and tonic. Thank god for expenses!

5) Hanson
Yes... The "kids that sang Mmmbop". Well they are still going strong and I was over the moon to finally get to meet them. I've followed their musical career for the last 14 years and it was a pleasure to discover that they were just as lovely and pleasant as they have always seemed. Now, how to work with them? Hmm. The frustrating thing is, is that I was in with a chance of working with the band, however there are others after them too. I KNOW I would do better job than anyone else on this. There aren't many people in the industry who know the catalogue, the fans, target market and of course the values inside out the way I do. But how to convince them of that without sounding like a crazed fan?

6) Grandpa
One of the most upsetting and heartbreaking experiences of my life, was losing my Grandpa. He passed away peacefully late last year and honestly, I have never felt pain like it. I still miss him and still think I see him and do a double take when I see some elderly man in London. I don't think he ever even visited this city! Just wishful thinking.. R.I.P Grandpa, you will be missed forever.

7) Dad

Still ill, still ungrateful, still complaining, still pretty much useless. He has perked up a little bit now that is due to become a Grandpa himself. Maybe he will take this chance to man up and be the person he can and should be? fingers crossed!!

8) Pets
I have now got a hamster... named Hammond. That's about all I can say on this subject.

9) Weight
I have managed to gain approximately 45lbs in the last 8months. That's not cool... nor comfortable. It's either thanks to contentment... or takeaways.

10) Mum
Myself and my Mum have never been very open with oneanother. As Mothers go, she was amazing, however she has never really known much about me, including some major life changing experiences. We have agreed to go on a holiday together at the end of this month to spend time with each other and perhaps get to know each other better. i'm not overly enthusiastic, there is just too much to tell, but nonetheless, it's lovely that we are both making the effort.

So there we go, that's 10 facts from the past year which brings me back to present day.

What have I missed?

GA X

Counting My Blessings...

I listened to the most beautiful piece of music a couple of days ago, "A song for all seasons" from the album Hymns & Hers by the amazing Oliver Schroer. I was introduced to Oliver's music and his story by his fantastic publicist and close friend Jane Harbury while working in Toronto for the summer. Oliver was diagnosed with leukemia which then progressed to terminal, and not once did he lose courage. listening to his track made me go and look over his old mail-outs to his thousands of fans across the world.

"We all have to die some time. None of us will live on this planet forever. I think some people live very intensely and burn very brightly during their time here. I think I am one of those people. A shining star while I am here. So I look at my life as I have lived it, and I feel very satisfied with all I have achieved and gone through. As a musician and artist I have found my voice on my instrument of choice. "
(Oliver Schroer 08/04/08)

After re-reading Oliver's emails it made me realise that we should all be counting out blessings, we should make an effort each day to remind ourselves of everything that we are thankful for so as I am short of time at the moment, here are the first 5 blessings that pop into my head:

1. I finally feel comfortable in my job. I am now permanent and feel like I am able to cope at the moment. I am being challenged every day and loving every minute of it. I wake up in the morning and look forward to going to work.
2. My re-location to London has all in all been a success. I may not have much money. but I have a great place to stay, great housemates and I am in a great location.
3. I still have all my amazing friends in Scotland and a great place to go home to.
4. Over the years I have been lucky enough to make many friends who have either gone on to live overseas, or who have returned to their home countries. I get to look forward to seeing them again as well as a great excuse to travel!
5. Many opportunities have came my way. Whether it be through going to University, or travelling, or being able to follow my ambitions and dreams. I am gradually working my way through my 43 Things list and it feels fantastic!
   
   

It feels good to do that! It makes me smile to realise that I am actually an incredibly lucky person. Yeah, bad things happen, so what? Things aren't always great, so what? No one said life would be easy, and we must make the most of all we have and enjoy every minute we have!

"I do want to encourage you, that when you do stuff, and get into projects in life, make sure you have the maximum amount of fun and satisfaction you can have. Don’t settle for just a bit of fun. You might have heard the saying ‘More is less’. Well, that only applies sometimes. Often, more really is more. And when it comes to getting satisfaction from creative projects you are involved with, you can bet that more is more, so grab the moment and make the moment big."
Oliver Schroer (8/4/08)

Tips / Advice for Relocating to London

This morning I found a To Do list that I had written upon my arrival in London and over it brightened up my day, as the top 10 things on my list… the top 10 things I considered important to me, I have completed. It has reminded me that I actually have achieved a lot since coming to London. I have done a lot, and it has not been a complete disaster.

London is an amazing city and I would highly recommend it to anyone. It is a fantastic place to live (unless you live central… ) but I thought I would write my top tips when moving to a big city.

- Pick a nice area to live
Do your research! Like all cities, London has its good areas and bad areas… You do not want to live in a bad area of town – it takes away your freedom! But then again, a very good area of town is going to be mega pricey. I chose to move to Acton – typically a rough neighbourhood but the area I live in is closer to Chiswick a middle class area and therefore I get the best of both worlds, a relatively cheap (by London standards) place to live and close to a lovely area (if a little too posh) I haven’t had any trouble whatsoever! And it has almost been a year!

- Find some great friends
Easier said than done in this city! Everyone is very concentrated on their own lives and will not look twice at you unless you make the effort first. But then they are very wary of this. I made friends through my second job and I wouldn’t change them for the world. A great mix of people - I love them all! Or use meetup.com
(yes I am aware that the photo is awful!)

- Discover the ‘countrified’ things in your area
In London people are so bogged down in city life, they tend to want to be in the country. Therefore there are many farmers markets, gorgeous park spaces, canal / riverside cafes and bars etc. It really eases the stress of the city and works whether you are alone, or with a great bunch of friends.

- Have a regular place
If you head to the same café at the same time every few days, you will tend to see the same people, meaning that you become a familiar face and then if you can, work up the courage to speak to them… another way of making new friends.
My place of work became my regular haunt... meaning I made mad friends, like the madman in this picture! :)

- Know what is 'close' by you
All of a sudden you have moved from somewhere that everything was familiar to a strange urban wilderness which at first can seem daunting… but if you need out of the city for a while, be aware of how close you are to so many other places! Head to Kings Cross / St Pancras and take the Eurostar to Paris for a couple of days. Or jump on a train to Brighton for the sea air, or even head to Bath or Bristol… it is all close at hand now!

- Learn to love the tube
By far the easiest mode of transport. But learning to love the people barging into you, or the 5 people squashing you on a packed tube at rush hour is far more difficult. Develop a thick skin and deal with it. If need be barge back… or say something! Believe, they sh*t themselves.

- After a while find yourself a lovely partner in crime
Whether that be a friend that you meet that you instantly never want to lose or a special man / woman.
Someone to share great things with, and someone to lend a shoulder to cry on when you are feeling down or homesick. I was lucky enough to find a great friend in Fiona… not so much luck on the man front… for a massive city with such a diverse population – I have had zero luck with men - Massively attracted to a man who is both inappropriate and emotionally unavailable… typical!


Like I said, London is a great city, I would go as far as to say London is the best city in the world! (That I have visited) This is probably due to the great friends and the great experience I have had.

Reading my list earlier today made me realise that while moving here and starting a new life has been difficult and while things have been mad the past couple of month, I have made the right decision. Moving to London was worth it and I love it!

Now the stressful things just have to ease up a bit and all will be well in my world :)

“A house is made of walls and beams; a home is built with love and dreams.”

Curling up in my bed last Friday night, I felt… peaceful. I think that would be the best word to describe it. Everything was buzzing around me, but lying there I could not help but feel that if I stayed there, everything would work out just fine.

Unfortunately that was my bed in northwest Scotland rather than in London. Leaving my house on Monday was difficult, it was as though for the short time I was there I slipped back into childhood and leaving was like walking away from it again, back into a world where everything seems to be crumbing.

Going home is a strange thing for me now. It conjures the old memories, which in is unpleasant to some extent, but at the same time, it is where I recognise everything, I know everyone and I feel cared for.

Memory is man's greatest friend and worst enemy.
Gilbert Parker

I become a small child again - my Mum making me a cup of milky tea in the morning, looking out of the kitchen window and seeing a the hills, the chapel and the fields.

When someone is in their childhood bed, with the duvet wrapped all the way up to their face, nothing else can go wrong, they are unable to annoy people, and nobody can get to them. They are able to be alone with their thoughts, safe in the knowledge that if they leave their bedroom, family and friends will surround them. Nothing bad can happen there now. It is my truly peaceful place.

Childhood has no forebodings; but then, it is soothed by no memories of outlived sorrow.
George Eliot

Strangely enough, home usually evokes memories of Scott, but memories of when we were happy and I felt completely safe:


I am not mourning our relationship, but I do miss his friendship and admittedly I miss feeling as secure as I felt at the time this photo was taken.

While in London I am making a definite push to not discuss anything I have going on personally. I refuse to become known to everyone here as a misery guts. Some people know too much about me as it is and I cannot allow this to any further. My friends here are too precious to me – if I become a nightmare, there is a high chance I will lose their company.

Speaking of precious friends I’m going for dinner with a friend that I haven’t had a chance to catch up with for a while. It’ll be lovely. He is a good guy and someone you know that you can trust implicitly. I am really looking forward to it, it will be a lovely night.

Things That Drive Me Insane

A list of 5 things that are driving me insane:

1) Colleagues who have made it their mission to piss you off by giving you work when it is not necessary
2) People who make plans of your behalf then get annoyed when you decline politely
3) Bosses who realise that you are working 70 hour weeks despite being incredibly stressed with family and your real job but still insist on making you feel useless because you can't work an extra 3 nights per week
4) Colleagues who think that your work isn't as important as theirs and that deadlines with national newspapers mean nothing in comparison to ensuring that a box is ticked in the right colour on a spreadsheet that means nothing to anyone except her anal self
5) Being treated like a piece of crap when you are working your hardest and running yourself into the ground everyday.


“It's not enough to be busy”

GAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH

RANT OVER.

10 Things I Love and Miss About Scotland

The concept of 'Home is Where the Heart is' has concerned me over the past few weeks. I have realised that I am becoming more and more at home in London. Does that mean my heart is here? 

I would find it very difficult to leave London, and I have not yet been here a year. I still miss Scotland and all things Scottish of course but these days they seem less important than they did before. 

To remind myself of why I will always want to call Scotland home I have made a list of 10 things I love and miss about Scotland. When I first wrote these, they also acted as a relief to homesickness!

• Scottish News
  

Newspapers are television are far less ‘British’ in Scotland. A fact I did not realise until living in London. The Scottish Parliament, the fish farms, Glasgow, Edinburgh - I miss it all being discussed (in a Scottish accent of course) It can be a struggle to relate to full UK politics as opposed to issues that affect your ‘local’ area.
Tip: Keep BBC Scotland website as home page. I have to keep up to date some how!

• Scottish Football
  

Football is without a doubt Scotland’s national sport and the title race was often a talking point in conversation with my family. It is different now. I used to love going to the pub to watch the old firm matches. Down here it is all Irish bars and walking into a sea of green is more than a little daunting for ‘gers girl. The atmosphere that surrounds the sport in Scotland is very different to down south.
Tip: Keep up to date with what is going on with your team and persuade a neutral friend to come along and watch the game in a non ‘team themed’ bar!

• Socialising
  

The comfy sofas in Beanscene – the high tables in the tree house – the uncomfortable benches in Wellies – the long sharp grass at Wellingston Square. I miss it all! Going places you recongise, with people you have known for years is comforting. It gives you a sense that everything is OK. Nothing is changing too 7803 1300quickly and you can deal with it. Suddenly everything becomes new when you leave and I found that particularly hard to deal with.
Tip: Get a regular coffee shop / pub / bench in one of London's gorgeous Royal Parks and pay attention to the new routines that you witness.

• The Beach
  

Living by the coast is something you cannot truly appreciate until you are no longer there. Having lived by the coast my whole life I never realised how important it was to me. The long walks, watching the boats coming in, listening to seagulls and watching the sun set are all things I truly miss. There is something so calming about the sea that the Thames can simply not match.
Tip: Go to Chiswick and take a long walk west along strand on the green. Its gorgeous and semi-relaxing. Failing that, hop on a train to Brighton!

• The Food
  

Who new Scottish food was so different from food in England? For one thing, no tattie scones or square sausage. (Rule number 1 – do NOT be fooled into buying spermarket square sausage in an English supermarket. It is awful!) Even restaurants are different! It could well be that they don’t fry everything as they do in Scotland. Either way… it is not the same.
Tip: Whenever you have friends or family coming to visit, encourage them to take the train and bring you a Scottish food parcel. Lovely! Failing that - make your own!

• The Old Regular Haunts
  

The places I used to love going such as Ronaldo’s in Ayr for some new and exotic flavour of homemade ice-cream, or The West Kirk for burger and pint.
Tip: See above in Socialising! Also, find novelty places, such as cafes that specialise in chocolate ☺ treat yourself every once in a while.

• Glass Bottles of Irn Bru
  

They don’t exist in England. You can buy cans in most shops (not in pubs or restaurants) but you cannot get a glass bottle and every Scottish person knows it tastes best out a glass bottle. It is my number one cure for a hangover and it is non-existent. Bad news!
Tip: As with Food – get friends and family to bring it to you!

• General Courtesy
  

Everything from people saying sorry when they barge you on the street to complete strangers saying good morning on the streets. That doesn’t happen in London – not even in Chiswick!
Tip: Do as you would do in Scotland. Graciously apologies if you collide with someone. Thank people for holding doors, say hello to friendly looking people if you are the only two on the street. It makes them a little happier and you never know – they might follow your lead with the next person they see.

• Live Music
  

The atmosphere at a gig! People say that the Scots are the best crowds in the world – I can see why now! The venues are amazing, the bars are cheaper, the sound is phenomenal and crowd are immensely supportive.
Tip: Go to small local band gigs. The band’s friends provide the same atmosphere in a far smaller level.

• The Humour
  

Sarcasm is a permanent fixture in a Scot’s personality. Apparently it doesn’t work like that down here! I had to learn this the hard way!!!
Tip: Save it for when you visit Scotland.

“Life is partly what we make it, and partly what it is made by the friends we choose.” - Tennessee Williams

Sometimes you meet someone and while you don't realise it at the time, they have changed your life forever.

These people do not have to do anything extraordinary, they do not have to be blatant about it, it just happens, as natural as waking up in the morning. They make you see the world in a different way and open your eyes to all the little things that you have been trying to see for years.

When I moved to London I was lonely, and I retreated into myself. I never went out and I focused solely on work, then one sunny afternoon in walks a young couple, Fiona and her amazing boyfriend Stuart. Fiona is a smiley skinny little thing. A nurse by day, a party girl by night. She has an energy and a laugh that can bounce around any room and a personality far bigger than her tiny frame. I quickly discovered she was possibly the nicest girl I have ever met.

The meeting of two personalities is like the contact of two chemical substances: if there is any reaction, both are transformed.
Carl Jung

We clicked instantly and ended up having a bit of a night out (understatement...) to which I was invited with Fiona and her lovely friends. By the next day, I knew. we were mates for life.

Last Sunday Fiona moved back to Australia and for me it felt like a horrific breakup. I tried to stay strong and not cry, but I didn't really succeed, I literally felt heartbroken. I cried for hours after she left and then braved a walk into town, where I proceeded to cry some more. It was as though I was grieving. I have lost such a lovely friend, one of the best friends I have ever had.



You know when you see these girly friendships on television or in a film and while they look fun and sweet it looks fake and almost pathetic... well that is the kind of friendship I had with Fiona. Sunday afternoons with a bottle of wine, Saturday mornings curled up under a duvet etc etc.

The ornament of a house is the friends who frequent it.
Ralph Waldo Emerson

It was strange because we never had big heart-to-heart conversations, I mean don't get me wrong we had chats but never about hopes or ambitions, or past regrets. If something was needing vented at the time, it always referred to the present. This of course did at times involve sharing tears - over men, over life. But the big in depth discussions friends usually have... there never seemed any need for them.

Fiona is one of those people who truly has a heart of gold and I miss her and will continue to miss her more than I ever thought possible.

Without a doubt one of the best friends I have ever had and our friendship has changed me for the better. I can not thank her enough for that. she taught me how to relax, how to live for the moment and how to embrace life and everything it gives you.

“Truly great friends are hard to find, difficult to leave, and impossible to forget.”

Miss ya loads mate x